Who Hasn't Been Bothered By Pesky UFOs? By James DiGiovanna "The Threat," by David M. Jacobs, Ph.D. (Simon and Schuster). Hardcover, $23. WHO HASN'T BEEN bothered by pesky UFO aliens? They come, they abduct you, they probe your orifices, then they dump you in western Missouri. But have you ever stopped to wonder, what's it all for? Why are they doing this? And, why so much probing? Well, now the answer is before us in The Threat, a new book by UFO researcher and huckster-moron David M. Jacobs, Ph.D. (the bestselling author of Secret Life). It's actually a little unclear whether Jacobs is pulling a fast one, or is in fact a complete idiot. His section on his research methods is particularly bizarre. He goes on and on about the faulty research paradigms of other UFOlogists, but seems completely uninterested in finding corroborating evidence for his own cases. He claims that if lots of "abductees" report the same experiences, then they must be true, but he quickly dismisses the idea that media images of UFOs have anything to do with the consistency of reports of aliens who look like the ones in major Hollywood studio releases. He notes that many UFO researchers use hypnosis in reproducing hidden memories, and that this technique is prone to producing false reports, yet virtually all of his own data is from hypnotically retrieved memories. But all of that seems unimportant, because he alone has solved the riddle of why the aliens are abducting American citizens and freaking them all night long. It's for their breeding program!

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