TAX CHEAT: Beloved Gov. J. Fife Deadbeat III was in town promoting another tax-cut fantasy at a made-for-media event last week. Surrounded by various candidates starved for a little media attention, Fife said his latest tax cut would save enough money for the average family to pay the cable bill for a month. Meanwhile, of course, our overcrowded schools are caving in. Right up until the event, the Guv's staffers were telling the media Republican Steve Forbes would be on hand to back Fife's big tax whack, but the megawealthy geek never showed. One well-placed source tells The Skinny that Forbes had bailed some time ago, but Symington's team continued to promote his appearance because they figured the press wouldn't bother showing up just to hear Gov. Deadbeat. AND SPEAKING OF THAT INDICTED DEADBEAT: The Democrats have now taken to putting little "Friend of Fife" signs beneath Republican campaign billboards around town. "I always liked Andy Griffith's show and I always admired the professionalism of the Mayberry Police Department, but I wouldn't call myself a friend of Barney Fife," says Republican statehouse Scott Kirtley, who is facing Democrats Andy Nichols and Brian Fagin in the hotly contested District 13 race. "I'm appreciative of the extra attention the Democrats are willing to give me." YOU READ IT HERE FIRST: Last month The Skinny reported arrogant Tucson City Manager Mike "The Spike" Brown was job searching while the rest of the media either was ignoring it or reitererating Brown's vigorous denials. Now he's announced he's taking county administrator's job in Santa Barbara, Calif. Good riddance, we say. Brown's replacement will probably be long-time Assistant City Manager Luis Gutierez. But that means City Councilman Mike Crawford, who increasingly looks like every cementhead developer's dream, is not a happy camper. He tried to rally folks to ask Brown to stay--yeah, right, that would work when the guy's already out of here and Santa Barbara has announced he's coming. And Crawford's also been taking cheap shots at Gutierrez. Well tough darts for Crawford and the other two council members who were Brown sycophants, Janet Marcus and Shirley Scott, because Gutierrez appears to have the votes of Mayor George Miller and council members Molly McKasson, Steve Leal, and José Ibarra. Because of a weird City Charter provision, the Mayor can vote to hire a city manager, but he can't vote to fire one. In the meantime, Leal and Ibarra proved that any bureaucrat who publicly has two out of six council members and a non-voting mayor looking for his ouster will start looking himself. VOTEC REHIRED: After roundly condemning county staff and the San Diego-based computer firm Votec for bungling the primary election, and after ordering County Administrator Chuck Huckelberry to come up with recommendations to make the general election run smoothly, the GOP majority on the Pima County Board of Stupidvisors--Ed Moore, Mike Boyd, and Paul Marsh--subsequently voted to leave things exactly as they were. Which leaves Moore and Marsh, particularly, in a weird position: While at one point a judge had to order them to vote to approve a canvass they found to be totally screwed, now, on their own initiative, they're eagerly voting to retain the very staff and computer vendor responsible for that canvass. in fact, they've even approved a bigger contract for Votec. Expect a long and bungled night. THE BALLOT BUNGLE CONTINUES: As if the '96 election hasn't been screwed up enough, here's yet another reason to distrust the entire twisted process: Because nobody was sure if the results of the primary were accurate, the recorder's office couldn't print absentee ballots until September 28--which meant the absentee ballots are just rolling into town now from the printer in New Mexico. But, since the law required absentee voting begin on October 3, County Recorder F. Ann Rodriguez allowed people who needed to vote to use sample ballots from the printer. Now staffers from the recorder's office will be taking those sample ballots and transferring the votes to real ballots, supposedly under the watch of some nebulous "citizen's review board." The potential for outright fraud under these circumstances is enormous. We're not sure if the folks running the election are crooked or just despicably incompetent, but we're know for certain the voters of Pima County deserve much better than they're getting. WET ANNIE: The unofficial headquarters for the promotion of that ill-conceived CAP recreational lake on a hunk of dirt controlled by Tucson Developer Joe Cesare and his cronies seems to be Pima County Recorder F. Ann Rodriguez's office. Latest evidence for that is a mailer from Rodriguez touting the candidacy of Chuck Freitas, the owner of Falcon Pools, for a seat on the CAP Governing Board. Both the letter from Rodriguez and Freitas' own literature are vague on what he stands for, except for the line, "Combine storage, recharge and recreation" when it comes to CAP water. In his bio, Freitas says he's a member of L.A.K.E., the group promoting Cesare's project. So if Tucson City Councilwoman Janet Marcus is known as "Pond Woman" for the large body of water on her homestead, that makes Rodriguez the Lady of the Lake. And while there are 11 people running for four seats on the CAP board, Rodriguez just told a whole bunch of us whom not to vote for. Sorry, Chuck--we can do without the additional mosquitoes. WE STILL THINK HE'S A CORRUPT SOB: Stupidvisor Ed Moore just dropped another long, boring mailer on the voters of District 3. Called "What About Ed?" the first page is devoted to a strong statement by ad man Terry Pollock extolling Moore's virtues. Pollock is Moore's publicity agent of record, so Moore has pulled another first in Tucson--and maybe American--politics by featuring an endorsement from his own hired word wrangler. Maybe that's all he's got left, but give him credit for chuztpah. One part of Pollock's wandering babble requires a response, however. He states: "...never once in his tenure as District 3 supervisor has Ed Moore ever been accused of dishonesty, corruption or lack of integrity. Never once." Wrong, big boy. The number of times The Skinny has called Ed both a liar and corrupt over the last four years is into double digits, from the sleazy promo job he did for Waste Management on the Marana landfill to voting to rezone 90 acres for Don Diamond at River and La Cholla next to land Moore owns. We've reported on many of his corrupt practices. We agree with The Arizona Daily Star on this one--Ed Moore should be kicked the hell out of office.

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