FOR THOSE WHO WAITS: I told you two weeks ago that Austin's South By Southwest conference was going to be the musical event of the year, and it certainly lived up to the boast.

Sound Bites I whiled away the 18-hour (!) drive by scrolling down the list of more than 800 bands to appear, and was not surprised by the names. That is, until I hit Saturday--the peak of the festival--where I did a double-take. I blinked, I pinched myself, and when I was sure the name listed there wasn't a mirage born of staring for hours at blurred asphalt, I began repeating like a mantra, "Ohmyfuckinggod." I was going to see Tom Waits live in Austin.

Lesson No. 1 in human nature: We want what we know we can't have. If you'd asked me this time last year which three living musical performers I'd do just about anything to see, the answer would've been Frank Sinatra, Tom Waits and Lou Reed.

At least Lou was still embarking on the occasional tour, though less and less frequently. Sinatra...well, Sinatra was deathly ill. Best to accept I was born too late for an audience with Sinatra.

And then there's Waits: hasn't toured since 1987, the year when I botched my chance to see him at the Steppenwolf Theatre in Chicago. I've kicked myself regularly for the 12 years since. He's only played four live shows since then.

Needless to say, demand for tickets to the Austin show was completely insane. The festival's organizers wanted him to play the Austin Music Hall (capacity 3,000), but Waits was determined to keep the show as intimate as possible, opting instead to play the 1,300-seat Paramount Theater. (Point of reference: the Paramount is roughly the size of Tucson's Rialto Theatre, but with seats occupying the entire main floor).

The tickets were distributed for free on the morning of the show to badge holders (priority conference attendees got a crack at one of 600 tickets), wristband-wearers (300 tickets went to those who had access to the music showcases, but not the actual conference), and the rest were put on sale to the general public at $41 a seat.

All seats were issued randomly, so it didn't matter if you were in line at 5 a.m. or 10 a.m.--they began giving them out at 10:45 a.m. Even with this seemingly fair distribution system (maybe it only seems fair to me because I got third-row orchestra pit seats), many fans were shut out; people dressed like janitors and hid out in the theater prior to show time in a futile attempt to witness the event.

And at the show itself, as Waits and his band came back on stage for a second encore, a woman in the audience verbally lashed out at Waits for the amount of time she was forced to wait in line, and for the sheer volume of people who were denied access. "Well, you're here now," Waits responded. "We're in a beautiful old theater here, enjoy it." The woman continued her tirade, only relenting when a chorus of boos from the audience forced her to. (This proved to be the only bizarre event of the night, as the rest of the crowd was reverentially silent or whipped into a frenzy in all the right spots.)

The performance was nearly two hours, and showed Waits to be in superb form. He actually looked younger and sounded better than he has in years. (Could the fact that he didn't smoke a single cigarette during the performance have anything to do with it?).

Wearing blue jeans, a white T-shirt and denim jacket, and the trademark black fedora, Waits and his four-piece band (including Beck guitarist Smokey Hormel) launched into a set consisting mostly of material from his last four albums (the second, more eccentric cabaret-noir phase of his career), with the occasional trip down memory lane.

And none of the handful of new songs played from his forthcoming Mule Variations, due late April on Epitaph Records, disappointed.

"I don't usually play this one anymore--I used to play it all the time--but it's Saturday night," Waits announced before tackling "The Heart of Saturday Night." The legendary singer switched on and off from guitar to piano to mere vocals, which he occasionally augmented by singing through a megaphone, and engaged the audience with his standard hilarious between-song banter.

The theater was intimate enough that Waits entertained audience comments and questions on occasion. When a woman asked him when he was going to tour, Waits answered cryptically, "Tour, huh?" For all of our sakes, let's hope he's letting the prospect sink in.

LOCALS ONLY: My star-struck moments aside, I can happily report that our local representatives fared well at the conference, in their individual showcases and beyond. Calexico tied Built to Spill for playing the most times over the long weekend, each putting in four performances. In addition to their scheduled set at the Jazz Bon Temps Room, where they were joined onstage by Richard Buckner for a cover of Tom Petty's "The Waiting," Calexico also performed on the floor at the conference itself, at local record store 33 Degrees, and at a daytime party, wowing audiences at every stop and selling an assload of merchandise along the way.

In a bizarre coincidence, Shoebomb's Melissa Manas made a new friend--a sales clerk at Urban Outfitters--while shopping for some new duds the day before the band's scheduled showcase appearance. When she ran into the same clerk at a club later that night, he realized that the next band on the club's bill, the same band slated to play an in-store performance at Urban Outfitters the next day, was pulling a no-show. Manas quickly seized the opportunity by offering to play the open slot.

Shoebomb's set on the Outdoor Stage at the Electric Lounge was attended by an exuberantly enthusiastic crowd, and saw the band playing a mix of songs from last year's Pop Quiz CD, as well as a batch of new, as yet unreleased tunes. Simply put, they sounded better that night than I've ever heard them.

Crawdaddy-O's performance at the Elephant Room on Thursday was similarly received, as an ebullient crowd packed the house. Every bouncing face we could see had a smile. The brass band also took advantage of the fact that they don't need to plug in to win converts, hitting the crowded streets to perform for passers-by. On Friday night alone, they reportedly amassed $200 in busking change, no small feat in a town teeming with street performers for the occasion.

BAND WAGON: Back at home in the Old Pueblo...

Fans of the Grateful Dead are almost inherently open to new, eclectic forms of improvisational music, so it makes perfect sense that someone would come along and combine the Dead's free-jazz aesthetic with pure jazz. Look no further than this week's performance by Jazz Is Dead for that potent brew. Comprised of a truly stellar line-up of jazz and rock virtuosos, the band will feature a performance of the Dead's landmark 1973 album Wake of the Flood in its entirety, as well as other Grateful Dead classics, in a show billed as "jazz explorations of music from the Grateful Dead."

The band includes such noteworthy players as Grammy-nominated drummer Rod Morgenstein, who accompanied Peter Gabriel on his Secret World Tour; guitarist Jimmy Herring, of Col. Bruce Hampton & His Aquarium Rescue Unit; Dixie Dregs keyboardist T. Lavitz; and veteran bassist Alphonso Johnson, who's played with Bob Dylan, Santana, Bob Weir's Bobby and the Midnites, Wayne Shorter, Sergio Mendes and Quincy Jones.

Jazz Is Dead takes the stage of the Rialto Theatre, 318 E. Congress St., at 8 p.m. Monday, April 5. Advance tickets are available for $12 at Zip's University, Guitars, Etc., Hear's Music and Congress Street Store. Call 299-4733 for tickets; and 740-0126 for concert information.

Twice a year the Tucson Kitchen Musicians' Association presents outdoor live performances to raise funds for the annual (and not too distant) Tucson Folk Festival. An annual event in its own right, the mini-fest will be headlined by acclaimed bluegrass singer/guitarist (and former Tucsonan) Dede Wyland; along with former Titan Valley Warhead banjo player Ross Nickerson, who now lives in Reno, Nevada. Nickerson's new album, Blazing the West (Banjo), features guest appearances by Riders in the Sky and Tim O'Brien, among others.

The two will be joined by upright bassist Evan Dain and mandolin player Donny Russell to comprise a makeshift, Southwestern version of the Dede Wyland Band. Additional performers include "Tucson's Traveling Troubadour" Sal Valdivia, the dry humor of the Arnold/Klingenfus Ensemble, and the beautiful harmonies of guitar/vocal duo Stefan George and Lavinia White.

The event takes place from 1 to 6 p.m. on Saturday, April 3, at the Valley of the Moon, 2544 E. Allen St. (north of Prince Road, between Tucson Boulevard and Country Club Road). Admission is $6, with a $1 discount for members of various musical organizations. Tickets are $2 for kids 6 and over. Don't forget your picnic blanket, folding chairs and sunscreen, as all performances will be outdoors. Call 319-8599 for details.

Finally, it's not often I'll recommend you get up in the morning to see a performance. But you probably won't find The Merrimakers, a variety show put on by a group of senior citizens, during the usual club-dwelling hours. So get your java to go and check out their free performance at 10 a.m. Wednesday, April 7, on the outdoor stage in Armory Park, Sixth Avenue one block south of Broadway. If the charming message left on my voice mail is any indication, the show should be an entertaining one, indeed. TW


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